5 1/2 years ago, my husband and I were both working when we decided it was time to buy our first home. We wanted something we knew we could afford if I ever stopped working to stay at home. At the time, we were desiring to start our family. We bought our little, 3 bedroom, 1 bathroom, foreclosed home in a wonderful neighborhood in April of 2009. We made it ours by completely remodeling it. Every square inch of the house was painted, we redid the floors, we tore out the entire kitchen and replaced everything in it. We spent, days, weeks and months making this little home, our beautiful home. That June Brian was turning 30, so I saw it as an opportunity to invite close friends and family over to celebrate him and invite them to see our first home! 1 week later I found out that we were expecting our first child.
The new house project became working on a nursery and preparing for our first baby! What an exciting season that was for us! January 2010, I quit my job and in March we welcomed Emma into the world.
A turn around the bend and hard times came. I have spoken very little of all the details of that season. There were some dark moments for me. I was so happy with a sweet baby but so consumed with worry about how we would pay for our bills. I literally spent every free moment I had working on surveys to earn money to pay for baby food and diapers, I couponed like it was going out of style, I went without a car for 9 months so that Brian could drive mine (we couldn't afford the gas for me to drive around anyhow), I signed up for every freebie imaginable to help stretch our pantry. I worked endlessly to earn swagbacks, to earn amazon coupon codes to buy things we needed. It was tough. After paying for gas we had $20 a week for food left over. Don't ask me how we survived on that. All I can say is God always provides. In September, I began babysitting to help out financially. That was another "God's goodness" story. It was an answered prayer to a very specific prayer that Brian and I had just prayed, and the answer literally came in the mailbox the next day from a friend that I had not seen in years, who wanted me to watch her baby. In October...Brian's first raise came. It may sound crazy, but it was one day I will never forget because it felt like one of the happiest days of my life. I screamed, I jumped for joy, I cried, I thanked God.
That was not the end of the hard season by any means, a little raise does not solve every problem. The drought season really lasted until the following summer (2011). However hard that year or so was though, do you know I wouldn't change that we went through it? Yes I regret my lack of rest from not trusting in God, I regret allowing depression seeping in and affecting my first year with my first baby, I regret how self-focused I was on what we didn't have. BUT, I do not regret going through that season. You see, God used that season to FOREVER change me. God greatly convicted me about how stingy and self focused I had become. Every time we got an extra $20 from a bill refund or a birthday gift I had asked myself, which bill should I pay first? I read "Choosing Gratitude" by Nancy Leigh Demoss. My heart became GRIPPED about how much I complained about what we didn't have and how little my heart showed true gratitude for what we did have. You see, a heart of gratitude and a giving hand go together. If you are truly grateful for what Christ has done for you, your checkbook, gifts, talents, and time given by God will reflect your heart of gratitude.
From there, I was changed. When we came into extra money, my thoughts turned to, "Who can we give this too? Who needs money right now?" My goal was to pay more on debt and begin to give more! I remember (fall of 2011) a friend asked me what my 5 year, financial goals were. When I told her, she thought I was a bit of an over achiever. This is what I told her and look what God has done!
1. Pay off the Jeep
2. Pay off my student loans
3. Increase our mission giving by x amount
4. Buy a car cash
5. Save 20% for down payment of new home
6. Pay off Brian's student loans
1. Goal reached spring 2012
2. Goal reached Nov 2012
3. Goal reached summer 2012
4. Goal reached March 2013
5. Were in our new home!
6. Goal not met (yet)
I do not say any of this to boast in myself, NOT AT ALL.....but only to speak praise for what God has done in my life, and for our family. He has been faithful and He has blessed us unmeasurably, beyond what we could ever deserve. My boasting is in the Lord for what He has done! I give Him all the praise, because with out him, I am nothing and can accomplish nothing. Scripture is clear, it is the Lord who gives and it is the Lord who takes away. (Job 1:21).
Now, that my intro is over.....
This summer we tossed around the idea of putting our house up for sale. We were beginning to feel a little cramped, however we knew we could still make it work with a 3rd baby and for a couple more years. We were a little short of what we wanted to have saved so we thought it might be better to wait a little longer. Timing wise I thought this summer would be easier #1. Because the market was up and #2. 2015 would be a much harder year to move with Emma starting school, me desiring to add another child to our family, as well as Brian and I planning a trip for our 10th anniversary. So we went back and forth on what to do. We debated, we discussed, we sought wisdom, and we prayed. Then we just decided to go for it and see what would happen. We busily began preparing our house for two weeks to put it up for sale. On Monday July 21st we signed the papers. On Tuesday we had a showing at noon and the first person who saw it made an offer. It was crazy, it was nuts, it was shocking! My prayer the night before when Brian and I were praying together, was "Lord if you don't want us to sell it, have no one come look at the house."
We believed, as much as we could that this was the Lord was opening the door for us to move. Here are some things God did for us along the way.
1. The loan officer we have used for everything the past 5 1/2 years has become more like a friend to me. I kept asking him to get me a pre approval ready and kept not having one ready for me. One afternoon he calls me and says, "Janelle, I can't do this loan for you, I just can't". My heart just dropped. I couldn't believe what he was saying and I certainly couldn't understand why. He then tells me that our credit was so spotless that we would pay 1-2 thousand more in closing costs if we went to him because the government has changed so many things, and his hands were tied that he just couldn't give us the deal that we deserved. He gave me another loan officers number and told me that if he was doing a loan this is the guy he would use, and that this bank had the most competitive deal out there. Wow! How many loan officers in today's world, do you know that would give perfectly good business away just because they care and claim to be a Christian? It touched me that he cared about our family, that he cared that much about his work ethic and cared that much about his walk with the Lord. He will be a friend for life. When I got off the phone, I just wanted to cry. I was overwhelmed by his kindness, I was overwhelmed, again, with God's goodness and protection over our family.
2. Our realtor was also a Christian. An honest one too. When receiving the hud of the funds we would receive from the sale of the home, she found a mistake that we were paying her 1% too high. The difference was a $1300 one, in our favor and not hers. She went above and beyond to help us. She was organized, on top of things, and efficient. She fought for us and worked hard to get the best for us. She was sweet, kind, and patient. We fell in love with her, and believe this is the beginning to a new friendship as well.
3. One Sunday afternoon, we made a list of a few open houses that we wanted to go see. When I saw this house listed, I remember very clearly what I said to Brian that morning: "This house is above our price range, so I am not sure it's worth our time to look at it, but it might be good just to see a different lay out." Brian thought it would be a good idea just to check it out. The realtor inside told me the family had been relocated and were very ready to negotiate. I went upstairs and I know this sounds crazy but I just saw our family here. I was opening one of the closet doors when Brian walked in, and I said in a quiet voice to him, "Honey she said the sellers are willing to negotiate on this one."
We kind of tried putting it out of our mind because of the price and we were a little leery of buying a house that was on a little bit of a slant/hill. We kept looking with our realtor. I kept not loving each one we saw. There was one that popped up that was beautiful, before we could look it, she called to tell us it was pending. Then I said, "You know what Cindy? Every time I look at a house I realize I am comparing it to an open house one that we saw, it's above our price range, but it might be worth it to have you walk around with us in it so that you get a better feel of what we are looking for." She thought it was the perfect house for us and that we could get it much lower then the asking price. And so ....the process began!
4. The negotiation between us and the seller began. We soon found out he wasn't so happy about negotiating after all. At one point we were told he was offended by our offer. We waffled on countering back the 2nd time because of fear that the seller would tell us forget it, but we stuck to our guns and countered again. We then came to a price that we could all agree on. 1 and a 1/2 week later, we were faced with what seemed to be an obstacle. The appraisal did not come back high enough. In other words, our agreed upon price was higher then the appraised value so we could not get the loan amount we would need to buy the house. It was either the seller come down to the appraised value price, or we would have to begin a new search for another home. Whew, that day was intense. I fretted some, but I should have known that the Lord was going before us and working it all out. The seller did change the price contingent on he would not make the repairs we asked for per the inspection report. The outcome was we got the house for the original offer we submitted and stayed under our budget (rather then being at the top of our budget)!
5. When we started a search for a new house, Emma began praying at meal time for a pink room. All the colors in this house are neutrals (gray, blue, brown) except there was one room painted pretty pink. I know we could have painted a room pink in any house, but I just love that God answered the prayer of my little girl as well.
What I find amusing is both with this house and our first house we kind of walked in them by accident, (not accident to God of course). The first time we were searching for a home we were only considering a home with 2 bathrooms. When we walked into it, I remember walking around searching for the 2nd bathroom and asking out loud, "Where is the other bathroom". We would have never even gone to look at that house if we saw on the listing it only had 1 bathroom. But we had a vision, we saw the potential, and it was a stepping stone to be where we are today.
Now, for the part of where I have struggled in this journey. I have struggled with fear of man, fear of judgement of the house we have chosen to buy, and fear of criticism. In the moments of my insecurity I reached out to two different people seeking words of wisdom.
The first person told me that if our tithing/giving remain and we are still living within our means, then we have to push past judgmental and critical people. Certain people will always find something to criticize about. Also, she reminded me that for whatever reason, God chooses to bless each family differently. We can't humanly understand why God has given us so much and why God has allowed others to have so little. But God's ways our not our ways, His thoughts are not our thoughts (Isaiah 55:8). I can not question God's authority. My responsibility is to seek God with how to be the best steward with what He has chosen to give me.
One friend had reminded me of the parable of the talents. (Matthew 25: 14-30). Talents in this passage means money by the way, not actual talents. Scripture says the master gave to each slave differently according to his own ability. The first slave, was given 5 talents and immediately he went out, traded and gained 5 more talents. The second man was given 2 talents and went out and gained 2 more. When each of them returned to the master, the master told them "Well done good and faithful slave, I will put you in charge of many things, enter into the joy of your master." The 3rd man was given 1 talent but he was wasteful with it and hid it. The master called him a wicked, lazy slave. He then took his talent away and gave it to the slave that had 10 talents. Verse 29: "For to everyone who has shall more be given, and he shall have an abundance; but from the one who does not have, even what he does have shall be taken away."
Point is, I am not responsible to do as much as the person next to me. I am also not supposed to complain that the person next to me has more then me. What I am responsible for is to use what God has given me as faithfully as I can.
The second person I reached out to shared with me her heart for wanting a bigger home many years ago. She wanted to use her home for the glory of God. She said she has hosted church meetings, her home has been a refuge for several missionaries, and I know I have personally enjoyed staying with this person on multiple occasions. Her heart was to use her home for God's kingdom and that is what she has done.
It was from that conversation that I felt lead to create a space for guests in our home. I am not sure to what capacity God will use our home, but I certainly know that I want Him to use it and I want to cultivate a willing heart for Him to use it.
Then, preparing to move in, buying things for the guest room became one of the most exciting for me. A friend sold us a frame, mattress, and boxspring for only $30. We had Brian's grandmother's old headboard stored in the attic, which I painted to give it a new look.
As I began preparing for this room I kept thinking about the woman of Zarephath. If you do not know her story please go read it (1 Kings17:8-16). But the short version is God sent His prophet Elijah to this widow. She only had enough bread and oil for one more meal. God's instruction, through Elijah, was to share what little she had with this man of God. Elijah asked for some water to drink and a piece of bread. She told him that she was actually gathering sticks to go prepare her last meal with what she had left in her jar to feed her and her son and then die. Her supply of food was exhausted and so was her hope. Elijah told her to go do what he asked her to do and that when she was finished she could make one for herself and her son. Then Elijah said, "For thus says the Lord God of Israel, 'The bowl of flour shall not be exhausted, nor shall the jar of oil be empty, until the day that the Lord sends rain on the face of the earth.' ". And it didn't. Every time she went to that jar, there was enough for another meal.
That story touched the depths of my heart many years ago when we were going through our season of drought. I had asked God then to help me to be more like that widow, to give of myself past what I think is "humanly" possible and to give out of FAITH not out of sight.
When I think of this story I have always had this visual of a pitcher. I am not sure why really, I just do, and I always have. When browsing for decorations for this bedroom I came across this piece. I know it might sound silly or dumb, but I just felt this was a beautiful little present from Jesus, Himself.
This pitcher is a symbol to me that when my supply feels or looks as if it may be exhausted that I just need to continue to be faithful and obedient to Christ and my supply will never run out.
I want this bedroom to be my "giving room" a haven for whoever may need it. I have some beautiful ideas in my head of how I want to decorate it, but here is a sneak peak for now until I have time to put it together the way I would like.
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