In Memory of Miss Carol

Today marks a year of the passing of a very dear friend of mine. I called her Miss Carol. She and I were extremely close. Really she was like a Mom to me and honestly for a little while she was one of my best friends. A year ago today she passed away unexpectedly. I do not want this to be a sad blog rather I just want you to reminess with me.

I got to know Carol the summer before my senior year of HS when my Dad accepted a pastor position at her church. Carol was always friendly and really cute:) For some reason, she just really took to me and decided she wanted to take me under her wing. I am not sure how it came about me going to her house the first time but, I remember it was in October sometime. Before I left she gave me an envelope and told me not to open it until I got home and that it was "our little secrete." When I opened the envelope I found a $100.00 with a sweet note that explained she wanted to help me pay for my senior pictures. Later on that year she hired me to clean her house and paid me $20.00 each time. Now that I look back, I think she just did it so she had an excuse to give me money. She knew I wanted to go away to a Christian college and di whatever she could to help me out. Carol and I became so close that year that I actually went over there every Monday night to watch 7th Heaven together. A lot of times she made sure she had cream soda stocked in the fridge for me. She introduced cream soda to me and I fell in love with it. Every time I see a cream soda bottle now, I think of her. During the summer I worked as a waitress and almost once a week I would take her home a piece of pie and then stay all night with her. She always made me a fresh bed, tucked me in, and called me her little "honey bunny". She was good to me. She treated me special. And boy was she special to me. She often visited me when I waitressed and left me big tips and when I went to my car I usually found a note left for me on my windshield. She knew the struggles I was going through and knew the fears I had about leaving to go away to school. But she always encouraged me. Shortly before I left, I spent the night with her and the next day she took me shopping. She wanted to get me "stuff for college" like towels, toiletry items, medicine, ect... It was so sweet. When we got home I broke down! I cried and cried. You see, I had a lot of pressure from Mom and Dad to stay home and not go away to school. I put up a big front and just acted strong, and excited, and determined that no one could talk me out of leaving. No one, except her on that day knew how terrified I really was about going 900 miles away from every thing that I loved. I told her I couldn't do it, I was getting cold feet. She held me, encouraged me, and told me I was going to great and reminded me I was walking the path that God had for me.

Here is two pictures of us at my going away party.











About one week before I left, she told me "I am taking you away. You work so hard and you need a break before you go off to school." So her and I went to Daytona Beach for a weekend. She got a motel right on the beach. A wonderful, relaxing weekend is what we had!
Here s a picture of us on the beach. (Sorry it is not a good quality one.)
Then off to school I went. Carol and I talked several nights a week, for at least an hour at a time. She was my best friend in many many ways. She was faithful to have a card in the mail to me almost every week. Sometimes more than once a week. Through my years at Temple, her and Tom always sent me flowers or balloons for my birthday, and an Easter basket for Easter.

In October, she told me she was coming to visit me! I was so excited. I made an index card from the day she told me with the number of days on it. Each night before I went to bed, I crossed off a number until she arrived. I was like a kid in a candy store. She came the first weekend in November and we went to her Aunt Cathleen's house in Bristol, VA. Unfortunately, I got sick that weekend and couldn't do much. But she took care of me, made me soup, gave me medicine, made me drink water and made me rest. We were together. That was all that mattered really. Then we went and stayed in a fancy motel in Chattanooga one night and we went out to eat so she could meat all my friends. The next day, before she left, again she stocked me up. She got me water, treats, cream soda, purple hat and mittens. She was so afraid I was going to get cold during the winter. Saying goodbye was almost as sad as the time before. I found a card and left it in her car. On the front it had dirty laundry. It read, "This stinks!" On the inside it read, "Leaving you is worse than dirty laundry." Here are my two favorite pics from that trip.
Of coarse I got to see her about a month later for Thanksgiving. Then at Christmas I was trying to find a ride home and a boy that I had never met emailed me and said I could catch a ride home with him. Carol did not like that very much. She did not want me riding with a strange boy I had never met. So, she got in her car and came to get me.
The Christmas break, things got really tough, very quick. She came down with ammonia and her husband Tom learned that he was going to need a heart transplant. Carol was never the same after that. I went over one night that break and cleaned her house for her since she had been so sick. I thought, now it is time for me to give back to her. Before I left, she ran to her room and gave me her favorite glass clown. I could tell by the look on her face it was her way of saying thank you and telling me that this time this was all that she could afford to give. You know, I have always hated clowns, I thin they are ugly, but that clown she gave me meant more to me than any other gift she had ever given, because it was truly a gift from her heart. I still can not part with that clown.
Tom was her life, her soul mate. The thought of him needing this transplant devastated her. The fear of it, the stress of taking on the bread winner role changed her happy, vibrant, and carefree spirit. The following semester Tom was in and out of doctor visits and hospitals. I remember one night she called me weeping.
In March, the doctors decided to put in an experimental pacemaker to see if that would help first. Thankfully, it did. I was able to come home for the surgery and be with her through it all. She never completely bounced back though. Still every time I was home I went and spent a night with her, at church I always sat beside her holding her hand. Here are a few pics of some of those times.this was a few months before his surgery. January 2002
This pic is funny looking because it ts from my scrapbook. But this was Dec 2002. Tom and I threw her a surprise birthday party.
This was Christmas time 2002. I went over to help them unpack their Christmas stuff and decorated their Christmas tree for them.
The Thanksgiving of this same year (2002), since I was unable to see them for their anniversary, I planned a special gift for them. I sang them the song "I will be here" by Steven Curtis Chapman and I framed the words along with a picture of them when they were dating. She cried. I also made a diner for them. Again, I wanted to give back some of what she gave to me. By this time, she started struggling with depression and didn't get out much. Tom said her countenance always changed when I came around.
I believe this picture was taken sometime right before my Junior year, August 2003. This was her dog Lookey. She just loved that dog.

In March of 2003, Her and Tom came to visit me again at college. They picked me up and we spent several days in Gatlinburg at her favorite motel. We had such a good time. Here are some pictures of our trip together.

I love this picture of her riding in the car.
This picture was taken at a nice restaurant. She told me she saved her pennies for a long time to be able to take me there and she made me eat a steak!
My favorite picture ever!
Carol, me and Tom.
It was around my senior year that we drifted off and didn't talk much except for occasionally. However, my love for her never changed and I always, always missed her dearly. Many times after Brian and I got married, I would walk around the house and say, "I miss Carol." Our closeness drifted but my love for her never did. I will always miss her. Although, I have such a great peace that she is with the Lord. The vibrant woman I once knew is vibrant again, saved from any heart ache, pain, or sorrow that she was suffering on earth. And because I know that I am glad she is there and not here any more. While, I am left behind, here on earth I carry many wonderful, wonderful memories of one of the dearest people I have ever known....Miss Carol.

PS. I still sleep with the purple, pooh blanket she bought me for Christmas my senior year of high school.